How to use your human - A Cat’s Instruction Manual
Are you a cat who has recently adopted a human? Watch out! Humans are bizzarecreatures who love their daily routine. They have cereals and coffee for breakfast. Boring. They sleep at night and never dream of catching a mouse. Boring. They can watch TV hours on end. Double boring! I wonder why they are called “coach potato”. You can play with a potato, while humans can sit still and watch other people play a sport.God of cats! Humans are boring!If they don’t have a child of their own, they’ll get on your nerves buying you funny clothes that make you look stupid or toys you don’t want to play with. They hold you in their arms when you’d rather climb a tree and give a bath in their tub. Be careful when you enter a room accompanied by your human. They are so clumsy and can shut the door on your tail. Fight hard when they try to give a bath, unless you know how to swim. Beware of humans! They call themselves owners. Let them think they are, but follow t