Letter to you

"I write this letter to you, but my purpose is selfish, because while writing  this letter maybe I can receive an answer from inside me.I followed almost everything you asked me , with or without my will, somehow blindly, because I don't which is the final destination.For some years, you guide me to go back to my childhood. I try almost every night before sleep, to remember or to receive a sign. Why you send me back there? I don't remember much and I don't know how will change me what I will find out.I discovered lately music and I would like to discover my voice. I know once I had a voice and I lost it somehow. Where? I don't know."When I wrote this letter, I must have been drunk, because I don't remember to whom I addressed it. To God? He is the only one who could guide me. To my mentor? Unlikely, because does not know about my childhood. And the others, do not talk too much with me.Instead, I remember I try to find every night an answer from my childhood. What I search there? Why?I...